Grumpy Old Men In Real Life
A brief reflection on how my year started.
I’m writing during the first real working day of 2026 for many corporate employees.
Yes, some of you and many others worked on January 2nd. I don’t envy the corporate worker that trudges back to work (especially the office) the day after New Year’s Day. This year boosted the drudgery of that return by 2x - sandwiching a legal working day between Thursday, January 1st - New Year’s Day - and Saturday, January 3rd.
But so far, the year is quiet. Spooky quiet. People are working, but some aren’t yet in gear, others are vacationing, and another fraction are too productive to be responsive. Silly people.
I meant to write a 2025 reflection of sorts, and still have that idea rooted somewhere in mind. And, something akin to my 2025 goals post in which I outlined what I wanted to explore during the year. I have a never-ending list of post ideas but, as you’ve seen, haven’t delivered much in 2025.
But for now and instead of dwelling, I’ll start with something short and simple. A momentary contrast between a lot of online noise about devices and how those devices matter In Real Life (IRL).
This morning started with a hair cut. I visited my barber in Mamaroneck, NY who talks fast and loud and says politically incorrect things with half his words.
He called me to explain that he wasn’t making my original appointment time. He offered something later. Today looked open, and I agreed with his offer.
His mood upon my arrival was part grumpy man, part apologist, and part thankful barber. He explained how another client of his had scheduled an appointment, earlier than mine, and waited outside the barber shop for a while before giving up and going home. That client then held a phone call with my barber in which he “spewed some shit” and was “such a pain in the ass.”
I laughed right away, imagining this often charged and opinionated barber arguing with an impatient and opinionated older client. The conclusion and life-long resolution that I delivered in that moment was something you might find amusing.
A major life goal? Don’t become a grumpy old man. Some of you who know me well might think I’m there already. But I’m not the point!
The client (Bob) showed up again halfway through my rescheduled appointment. And, right away, my barber said “Bob! You have to carry your phone! It’s 2026 Bob! How do you not carry your phone bro!”
He calls everyone bro. Kids. Old men. Friends. Probably the rare woman that steps foot in there, too.
Bob didn’t seem offended by the label but in calm words explained “No, I don’t really need it, and I really never needed it in all my years of business”
His answer was peculiar to me. Sort of grumpy. Sort of stubborn. But also somewhat right because how could I know whether his life worked or halted depending on his phone bulging out of his pocket. Bob might well have been a former CEO.
What stood out, of course, was the simple fact that Bob (his real name) missed a phone call that might have helped him avoid a bunch of driving.
It seems that Bob left his house without his phone. He does this often. His wife explained that to my barber. And my barber previewed the sequence of events to me before Bob arrived. My barber called Bob to inform him of the traffic destroying his punctual arrival at the shop, and to put him elsewhere on the schedule.
But Bob didn’t get the call. He didn’t have his phone. Bob’s wife answered it and explained how normal the absent-from-pocket phone was in Bob’s life.
I am, in retrospect, in awe of their conversation in a bunch of ways:
Technology (in theory, anyways) reduces time and/or friction between two things. In this case, the barber, and the client. They don’t need to drive to each other to talk or script letters in ink under candlelight - they call each other. Call it not-that-modern life, but better than smoke signals.
Bob may still have a landline. I’m not sure, and didn’t ask. My barber may have one too. So, phone landlines help Bob and my barber call each other. But of course, everyone uses a cell phone, right? It’s easier. It’s with you. It works almost anywhere in most suburban environments. Cell phones helps reduce communication friction, again, in theory.
Bob doesn’t need his phone. Why? Well, because, I posit that Bob doesn’t care about the friction. He spawned in a world in which you weren’t available with any ease when you were away from your landline. You made plans and stuck with them, or, if snagged by traffic or a sprained ankle, contacted your counterparties later. This friction seems almost unfathomable today. So many of us are in essence addicted to convenience. And, yes, rapid anywhere anytime communication is also necessary in some instances.
Bob also doesn’t use the barber’s booking app. I don’t know that for sure, either. But I’m guessing that he doesn’t because he doesn’t carry his cell phone when he leaves the house. A booking app is incongruous with that sort of lifestyle. Ask yourself this follow up: can you navigate your current life without any apps other than two? (SMS app, phone call app).
I suspect Bob lives a simpler decluttered life without as many electronic distractions.
Of course, I don’t know that last point for sure. It’s pure speculation. But Bob sat and waited for his rescheduled appointment. The emotional salt that he twisted into my barber was not anywhere as evident. Don’t forget: he didn’t have his phone, so there was nothing there to distract other than my barber’s brash words. And my good looks, from the back.
Electronic distractions are everywhere. And the general conclusion seems to be that they’re bad. But the very devices that distract us orchestrate or enable many things in 2026 life.
So, I’m thinking about my life now. I booked my appointment with the app. My barber called me and I picked up. And, yet, it would have been the end of the world to arrive and decipher the bad news without my phone. I could have waited.
And, that’s the key question I’ll leave you with. Can we wait? Do we have patience? Are our expectations so rewired in modern life that what once happened without devices seems out of this world?
apparently "waiting" is an idea from the past. Cell phones have changed how we live, for better or worse.